Thursday, June 3, 2010

WHY HAS HE CHANGED

Relationships, as I have always buttressed need alot of hard work and labour. When you begin, it is like the birth of a new born baby.
You have to nurture your love, get to know your partner's weakness and help in making him/her, a better person. The whole essence is for you to add value to his or her life as he or she does the same to yours.
Relationships can be categorised into three phases; the first is the chimera phase; that is the stage where both of you are totally unrealistic or impractical about how things are. You are both shielded in the enclave of wild unrealistic ideas that are completely impractical. You are blinded by your attraction of the outward attributes, thereby envisioning a perfect person and living in fantasy land.
The second stage, is the crisis stage ( that is, if both parties are being true to themselves ) and in this stage, the real personalities involved begin to unfold. You get into fights more often, you argue about little things and you get hurt even more often. Some singles even break up and make up a thousand times! It is at this stage you begin to come to terms with who he or she really is. You realise that you are both from different backgrounds, hence you have different perceptions about life's issues. Your idea of fun might be going out every weekend while his might be once in a while. You might hate onions in your food while huge chunks of onions might be her favourite item in her meals. All these little differences you realise cause irrelevant and unnecessary fights between you. You fight about his irritating nail chewing habit while he frowns at your being too conscious about public appearances. You both have differences, so what ? Who doesn't ? At the crisis stage, alot of roller coaster is involved with the heart and the only thing that will keep you together is your will to make it work, garnished with love.
The third phase is the reality stage. It is the point where you have to put it all out on the table. His flaws and your flaws and then you decided if you love her enough to go the extra mile, to accept the full package with all the dents and deformities. You realise that there will always be disputes, perfection is illusive and you can only work with what you see. You understand that, you can never change him in certain areas. Compromises are made and the bond becomes stronger. You learn from each other and it is plain to see where the glow in your eyes comes from. Then it might just be time to take things to the next level; you know, the going down on the knees, and "will you marry me" stunt.

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