Friday, June 4, 2010


Life is amazing when you are in love. You feel lightheaded and everyday brings bright hope, filling your soul with rays that intoxicate you and make you do crazy things at times.

Someone once said that true living is learning to live through the eyes of love and this love is that love which is not selfish.

True love is pure and healthy. It is not parasitic and when it comes, the vibes just flow through you and radiate in you that people around cannot help but notice that there is something different about you.

Have you ever truly been in love before? I am sure you know exactly what I mean if you have felt REAL love!

One thing is that everyone is entitled to his or her own share of true love; so, that brings me to the question of people that get heart broken.

Why do people get hurt in relationships? How is it possible that a relationship that was all cozy and wonderful grows sour all of a sudden?

Although I do not have all the answers, one pertinent point to note is that many a times, we rush into relationships for all the wrong reasons and so we rush out as well.

When we learn to be patient, accommodating and realistic, we will see through the scares in people and feel love flow our way.

Before I stuff you with more mushy hopeless romantic talk, let's go over to a story.

Jane shared her experience with me after reading one of my article of a guy who lost the love of his life just because he could not bring himself to say those three magical words: "I Love You".

I met my sweetheart Joey when I was quite young.

We had our houses directly opposite each other, so we kind of grew up together because we were also together when we were not in school.

When I was nine years old and Joey was twelve, we used to play together and throw things at each other.

As we got more matured, we became enemies, sort of, always being at loggerheads because all of a sudden, Joey started to act as a grown-up and matured, always wanting to be the boss. On my part, however, I just wasn't the kind of girl who liked to be bossed around especially when the orders came from Joey, someone I regarded as my age mate.

Several times, we quarreled and our mothers had to intervene and each time they settled a dispute between us, they joked that we were just expressing love in a different way and with time, our open rebuke indeed turned out to be secret love.

When I gained admission into college, I had to leave home to go to boarding school since my house was very far from the school premises.

Being in boarding school meant I saw less of Joey and at first, I felt very sad about it because I missed our arguments and the little funny things we did together.

Whenever I came home for the holidays, Joey and I still spoke but I noticed that we were not as free as we used to be.

On my part, I was conscious of his presence and I became shy especially when I felt his gaze on me.

By the time I was through with college, Joey was already in his second year in the university.

Life went on for me, and all too soon I gained admission into another university and I focused on my studies.

Joey and I kept in touch, our friendship was growing stronger and I admired the man he had become. I saw him as the elder brother I never had and I knew I felt something special for him.

Guys started coming to ask me out and I spoke to Joey about it. He advised me to be very careful and wise in my decisions and said nothing more.

I agreed to date one Biggie guy who seemed nice but he turned out to be a woman beater.

The very first day he raised his hand to hit me, I walked out on him and that was the end of our relationship.

I tried to date several other guys but I just didn't feel anything special for them at all. I told Joey about it and he just nodded and asked me to take my time and concentrate on my studies so that I don't get distracted.

I noticed he did not have a girlfriend, so I asked him what he was waiting for after he graduated from the university and he said he didn't have time to play around with girls.

I asked him if he didn't want to get married someday and he laughed.

He said he was only going to date one girl whom he will eventually get married to.

He sounded so sure of himself and I was forced to ask him whether he has met the girl yet and he just smiled.

I probed him more because I was eager to know who he was going to settle down with but he did not tell me. All he said was that I should wait and see and I said I couldn't wait to see who that lucky girl was and I hoped my man would be as wonderful as he is.

Soon, Joey got a job in a bank and he began to do very well.

He bought me presents occasionally and my heart melted for him more and more each day.

The day I realised what I felt for him was more than sisterly affection was when we had a fight.

I was doing my graduation party and so I invited him but he did not show up.

All through the party, I tried to reach him but his number was switched off. I almost went berserk with worry until I called his mum's phone and she told me he was at work.

He called me later in the evening and I had an outburst. I told him he ruined my party by being absent and he joked about it.

I felt really bad, so I told him he wasn't a good friend and he took offence.

For weeks, we did not speak to each other and I cried my eyes sore.

I realized that I was deeply in love with Joey but I was sad because I felt he did not feel the same way as he never gave me any reason to insinuate that he did.

Our relationship became strained or so I thought as we grew farther and farther apart.

My days became tortured and boring but I told myself I had to snap out of that feeling.

I threw myself into the pursuance of my career, happy to work from morning to night.

I was surprised one day when I got a call from Joey's mum. She said Joey was ill and he requested to see me.

I quickly went to the hospital where he was admitted and I almost cried when I saw my baby, looking so lean on his sick bed. I forgot about our quarrel and ran straight to him, giving him a big hug.

His illnes brought us back together and we became close again but he still did not give me any reason to think he was interested in me, so I continued to torture myself, hiding my feelings from him.

I could not believe my eyes when what I had been dreaming about for so long came true.

Joey and I were just gisting one cool evening when the issue of marriage came up.

He asked me when I planned to get married and I told him as soon as the right guy came along.

He did not say anything for a while and when he finally spoke; his voice was thick with emotion.He said I was definitely going to find the right man and he squeezed my hand.

My heart bled as tears gathered in my eyes because he had no clue I wished he was the one.

I asked him when he planned to get married and he said anytime from now and I was shocked because he never told me he had a girlfriend let alone someone he had decided to settle down with.

I looked away, trying to hide my tears, and just when I was about to ask him who the lucky girl was, he took me in his arms and his lips found mine.

I responded hungrily as my head felt light but all too soon my mind set to work and I broke away from him giving him a confusing look and he smiled.

He hugged me and kissed me again, this time with more confidence and when I asked him what was going on, he said he loved me and wanted to spend the rest of his life with me.

"Why did it take you so long?" I asked". "I was scared you didn't feel the same way and I did not know how to ask you so I decided to kiss you, telling myself that if you responded, then you felt the same way",he said, gathering me to himself.

That was how we started going out and our love has grown stronger each day.

So you see, what he couldn't put in words, he said it with a kiss.

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